Breaking the Waves (1996) - ickleReview (DVD)

Cheery Lars von Trier movie...erm, maybe not. Emily Watson plays Bess McNeill, an innocent Scottish lassie living in an obscure island community with a very strict - is it Presbyterian? - church, which does not allow women to speak during the service or attend funerals. When she marries Jan (Stellan Skarsgard), she is still a virgin. She is emotionally deprived and cannot cope with the separation when Jan must return to work on the oil rig. She prays to God to bring him home. Perhaps she wishes she hadn't.

Watson is outstanding as Bess. There is a scene where a light glistens in her eyes, making her look possessed by an angel. She looks so innocent and pure and has such a malleable face that a smile is only millimetres from a frown. The intertitles give the movie (and the audience) breathing space, appearing almost like paintings in a trompe l'oeil. Do not expect to be uplifted by this movie; although von Trier manages to find a strage beauty in its desolation. He tells a modern day version of the plight of Mary Magdalene. His lens is dark. The hand-held Dogme camera records the claustrophobic isolation of faith.

Nugget: perhaps you shouldn't watch this if you're feeling suicidal.

Before Sunset (2004) - ickleReview (DVD)

The sequel to Before Sunrise (1995). Director Richard Linklater, Ethan Hawke and Julie Delpy collaborate again, working more closely together on the script. In an on-the-set bonus feature of the DVD, Linklater calls them his fellow filmmakers. The two actors are also given full writing credits. An inspirational love story that magically avoids the Hollywood ::bleuch:: Moment.

It's nine years later. Jesse (Hawke) has written a book about his one night in Vienna with Celine and is on a promotion tour of European cities, last stop: Paris. Continuing the James Joyce/Ulysses theme (the first movie was set on Bloomsday, 16 June: the day of Ulysses and the day Joyce first dated Nora Barnacle), Jesse is promoting his book in the Shakespeare & Co. bookshop, where Sylvia Beach first published Joyce's Ulysses. Jesse even says he spent the previous night in the loft above the store. Celine has read his book and, as she is a regular patron of the bookshop, is aware that Jesse will be in town. Just as his talk is coming to an end, she appears ethereally at the window. They go out for coffee and spend the rest of the day, before sunset and Jesse's pending flight home to New York, talking like they did in Vienna: catching up on each other's lives, but really just picking up where they left off on the platform at the Viennese Bahnhof.

The concept behind this sequel is given in the trailer, which features the scene from Before Sunrise when Jesse persuades Celine to get off the train with him and spend the night in Vienna. Before Sunset fulfills that "what if", a decade later when Celine is stuck in a relationship that is not really fulfilling; and she thinks back to what could have been if she'd stuck with that guy she met all those years ago...

Jesse and Celine dominate even more than in the first film: there are hardly any cameos of Parisian life: they are so much into each other that they barely notice the Paris streets and parks they walk through. Time seems more precious than their first meeting, which seemed suspended in a timeless bliss. Their time together is limited in a more grown-up world of families and responsibilites. The entire film is like those delicious last moments of a conversation where both of you are dallying; neither wants to put an end to it because, in a way, that will be a rejection of the other person.

While Before Sunrise ended with the empty places that Jesse and Celine had populated together, that is where Before Sunset begins: the locations in Paris that they will make their own. This is an outstanding film with one of the most beautifully toned endings you will ever see.

Nugget: features a couple of wonderfully delicate songs written and performed by Delpy: Celine's version of events: her artistic response in complement to Jesse's book about that timeless night in Vienna.

Hannah and Her Sisters (1986) - ickleReview (video from TV)

Woody Allen movie starring Mia Farrow, Michael Caine, Carrie Fisher, Dianne Wiest, and Woody Allen. Hannah (Farrow) is the most successful of three sisters, making the other two feel inadequate in comparison. Only problem: her husband Elliot (Caine) follows through on a crush on her sister Lee (Barbara Hershey). Meanwhile, Allen plays a hypochondriac who thinks he has brain cancer and drops out of his TV work. You know the story: it's a Woody Allen movie. Come on!

It has a great jazz soundtrack and a gratuitous sequence where an architect takes Holly and her colleague, April, around New York to point out his (and presumably the filmmaker's) favourite buildings. There's a brilliant moment when Frederick (Max von Sydow), Lee's partner (a reclusive artist) stays in watching TV, which he doesn't normally do. He thinks it shows the whole spectrum of society: Nazis appear alongside deoderant salesmen. There's another great scene where a rich musician comes to Frederick's studio to buy a painting to fill up some wall space in the new place he's just bought in the Hamptons. Frederick refuses to sell on principal: his works are not to be referred to interior designers before they are purchased to see if they match the colour schemes and the sofa. "It's not a sofa, it's an ottoman!" Dusty, the musician, replies.

The film is structured in little episodes with intertitles, such as "We all had a terrific time", "The big leap", "Summer in New York" and "Lucky I ran into you". The writing has the feel of some of Allen's best stuff from the days in the 70s when he used to publish short funny stories and anecdotes in The New Yorker (collected in The Complete Prose).

Nugget: Woody on good form. As dependable as a BFO* oak sideboard.

* BFO = Big fuck-off

Before Sunrise (1995) - ickleReview (DVD)

The greatest love story ever told. A film by Richard Linklater starring Ethan Hawke and Julie Delpy as young twentysomethings who meet on a train from Budapest and decide to get off in Vienna to spend the night wandering around the city together, talking. Simply some of the best dialogue ever written for the movies. They have philosphical, radical, everyday sort of conversations that scratch away that bit deeper than most of us manage. It's wonderfully romantic and ends with such simplicity: the places that they visited together are shown in the cold hard light of the following morning: empty, except for the filmic memories of them together, like a warm breeze blowing through autumn leaves.

Linklater followed this with the best sequel I have ever seen, Before Sunset, which changes the way you think about the first movie if you've seen them both before. (Yes, it's better even than The Godfather: Part II!) And yet the sequel stands by itself as well. Hawke and Delpy are so natural together. In Before Sunrise there's a scene with them listening to a record together in a soundproof booth, where, as one turns to look, the other one looks away, only to look back again. These characters live and breathe in your mind. Watching it for the third time today, I came to realize just how much it has shaped the way I see the world: not only love and relationships, but death and cynicism, adulthood, conversation, and rationalism versus optimism.

Nugget: well worth the hassle finding an Australian import on eBay; even though they're releasing both films together in a box set on 7 February 2005!

Iris (2001) - ickleReview (DVD)

Film about the Oxford writer Iris Murdoch, based on the memoirs of her husband, John Bayley. Touching performances by Judi Dench and Jim Broadbent as the older couple; Kate Winslet and Hugh Bonneville the younger. The Director, Richard Eyre, states that he didn't want to make a film about an illness (Alzheimer's). For the most part, he succeeded; but I think it is more Bayley's books rather than the film that are to blame for focusing too much on the impact of the illness, rather than the achievements of Murdoch the writer. The film is more a love story in two parts: the young, courting couple; and the ageing, mellowing and forgetting Iris and John. There is not much in between. The earlier years are used more as a foil against which to pit the poignancy of the illness, seeing them, perhaps, through a glass, darkly. It is endearing in itself, but this is not a biopic.

Within these narrow limits, however, it is without doubt a success. Jim Broadbent is deserving of his Oscar for Best Supporting Actor. His rages and frustrations are particularly well articulated and go some way to repairing the character of John Bayley, against whom there have been many protests from admirers of Murdoch. The film explains well how he was damaged by Murdoch's freer-spirited attitude towards love, her vibrancy and charisma. There is the suggestion that he was always somewhat lonely in the relationship, perhaps felt too blessed and undeserving of such company.

Nugget: a film with modest ambitions but one which fulfills them to overflowing - often with tears.

Spellbound (2002) - ickleReview (DVD)

Documentary about the US National Spelling Bee. Follows eight kids aged 10-14 from the regional rounds through to the nationally televised championship in Washington D.C. A great way to reflect the diversity of American life: from Angela in Texas, whose parents came to America from Mexico 20 years ago, and whose dad still can't speak English; to April DeGideo from Pennsylvania, who studied her words for up to nine hours a day during the summer; to Neil from California, whose dad paid for 1,000 people to pray for him back home in India.

I usually hate kids, but these ones have started to change my mind. They're all very bright, quite quirky, a little geeky, but in a good way. It's not really all about the winning: Ithaca is all about the journey there: what skills and coping strategies you learn on the way. Spelling is just the end result. The kids learn how to study, how to be independent, how to come to terms with disappointment. A very uplifting movie.

The DVD itself is great: you get the bonus of an Epilogue, which fills you in on "where they are now"; and there are three deleted scenes of kids who didn't make it into the final cut of the movie. Some of these are the best: such as Bradley, who has a crush on his spelling tutor, or Cody, who has a cool philosophy on life and a great little sarcastic attitude.

Nugget: geeks have more fun. I should know.

Alexander (2004) - ickleReview (cinema)

Oliver Stone version of the legend of Alexander the Great, King of Macedonia and conqueror of the known world - well, from Persia to the east of India, anyway. Stone remains an impressive storyteller; Colin Farrell, who plays Alexander, as flexible as ever; Anthony Hopkins, a stage actor's performance as Ptolemy, who functions as the narrator in between prolonged flashbacks. Stone also gives time and space for good female roles: to Angelina Jolie as Alexander's mother, Olympias; and to Rosario Dawson as Roxane, his Persian wife - both of whom hold considerable influence over him.

Stone's treatment complicates the myth, showing how a mortal human can adopt god-like renown. There's a refreshing readjustment of our modern Western value system: Alexander has both male and female lovers. The only prejudice against his male lovers is that they will not bear him an heir.

There are also some significant coded references to the conflicts of today: the Persian ruler is chased away into the mountains, yet is still said to have the emotive power over his people of an Osama Bin Laden. And when the Alexandrian army enters Babylon (in what is now called Iraq), the native people are made to like them. The rapturous reception given by the conquered is left unexplained.

Nugget: compares very favourably to Gladiator. The epic is in revival.

Sea of Love (1989) - ickleReview (DVD)

Al Pacino cop movie. What are you thinking?! Of course Ally P. rocks. That goes without saying. Some killer likes shooting middle-aged taxpayers in the back of the head while they are getting down to some face-down self-love listening to an old record, "The Sea of Love". Pacino gets assigned to the case along with John Goodman. Pacino's character is a divorcee who drinks. Like Any Given Sunday, he's a lonely wee man who tries to find himself in the bottom of a cut glass. Then they devise a scheme to catch the killer by placing similar rhyming ads in the lonely hearts column of a New York magazine. Follow a series of dates in which Pacino and Goodman must woo the suspected lady-killer into giving them prints on her wine glass. Needless to say, the killer isn't who the film tries to make you think it is.

There are some good wee side stories, like the elderly single woman who looks just as lonely as Pacino, but whom he will obviously never call because he's on a job and he's just trying to be nice to her. They aren't developed, though. That would be another movie.

Nugget: a little eighties dated, but Pacino never disappoints.

Down by Law (1986) - ickleReview (DVD)

Jim Jarmusch movie. A pimp and a radio DJ are set up by separate enemies and end up in the same prison cell, later to be joined by Roberto Benigni, who somewhat steals the show in his pigeon English, dimwit dumbfuck sort of way. Shot in black and white, this looked a bit dodgy on DVD - rainbow flickers kept warbling on the screen. Tom Waits is pretty good as the radio DJ. A good companion piece to Jarmusch's latest release, Coffee and Cigarettes, some of which was shot around the same time in the mid-eighties, but wasn't finished until about a year ago.

Nugget: Would look better from a cinema projector; but let's face it, what wouldn't?

The Incredibles (2004) - ickleReview (cinema)

The new Pixar movie about a superhero family. Tom Paulin thinks this is a critique of America as the world's only superpower. It's also a fun movie. Mr Incredible has to give up his identity as a superhero when he gets sued for saving someone's life, hurting the saved one's neck in the process. He has to settle down in suburbia, working a cruel cubicle office job as an insurance man. On the side, he still snoops off regularly with his old buddy Frozone (Samuel L. Jackson - whose superpower is, of course, ice: because he's so damn cool) to listen to the police radio and do the occasional daring rescue. There's one scene that is particularly reminiscent of 9/11 when he and Frozone save a bunch of people trapped in a tall burning buidling just in time before it collapses. (I always thought it was dumb how firemen and policemen were suddenly called "heroes" after 9/11 when all they were doing was their daily jobs and thought nothing of it. Why should these people be called superheroes when they have so much fun doing it? Shouldn't everyone else be called a superhero for slogging away in their boring lives? If everyone's special, no one's special.)

Of course, things can't carry on like this: Mr Incredible is headhunted to join a secret mission to save everyone from a big robot, which is of course a trap set by someone who has a grudge against him. His wife and kids - who also have superpowers - also get involved. There are plenty of laughs and neat Pixar moments, such as the little kid who waits at the end of the Incredibles' drive, waiting for something cool to happen; or the wee fashion lady who designs their new superhero uniforms; or the subplot in which the daughter comes of age, emerging out of the insecurity of puberty.

Oh, and there's no point sitting through the long credits: there's no treat at the end this time.

Nugget: creditably incredible.

Chris Jericho

I moved into my new house in Jericho today. First time I've been properly independent from any institution: family, boarding school, college. Only staying here one night: flying home to Munich tomorrow for the winter solstice. Will settle in and unpack when I get back here in the new year. Haven't even got a duvet, so it's the ol' sleeping bag for tonight, and maybe the first night back in January.

Live or work

Today someone decided not to offer me a job. But someone else decided that they wanted to live with me. But then I've gone and done the same to other people: I said to someone I'd be able to work for them, but said that I wasn't going to live with someone else. Aren't I part of the proper adult game of dominoes now?

How good is "Dracula"?

Bram Stoker's late-nineteenth-century novel Dracula is supposedly one of the great gothic works of literature. (Perhaps an oxymoron.) In a recent review of a biography of Bram Stoker in the London Review of Books, Terry Eagleton points to this sentence in surprise (in truth, it's a bit of a duffer): "Mina came into the room with an easy gracefulness which would at once command the respect of any lunatic". I still laugh whenever I read that.

Word of the day

Came across an Ayrshire dialect word that I haven't heard in yonks today: "keech" - meaning "shite". It's quite often used in the phrase "bird keech"; or as an adjective: "to be keech at something" e.g. "The goalkeeper was keech at coming out for crosses." Brand new. Made me laugh.

It's pronounced - for those of you who are now going to integrate this fine lexeme into your daily vocabulary - with a Celtic "ch" as in "braw bricht moonlicht nicht". Try saying "quiche" with a lisp and you're almost there.

Pot Noodle™ potty

This is a letter I wrote today. Perhaps I have too much time on my hands. I await the response eagerly:

Consumer Care Department
Unilever Bestfoods UK
Brooke House
Crawley
RH10 9RQ

Dear Sir/Madam,

On Saturday 13 December 2004, at approximately 5.03 and 53 seconds of the post meridian, Greenwich Mean Time, I purchased an 89g Pot Noodle™ Snack (Chicken & Mushroom flavour) from my local Sainbury's supermarket in the Westgate Centre, Oxford city centre, Oxfordshire, England (store address: 21 Westgate, Oxford, OX1 1NX). Please find the lid enclosed. I wish to complain about the quality of the product. I think that, given the current crisis of obesity in the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland, and in the Western world as a whole, this is a problem that you should address with some alacrity.

First of all, I found the food snack located on the lowest shelf on the eastern side of the third aisle from the right, on the half nearest to the check-out payment facilities, but in the middle of the shop floor, by the central aisle. I think a food snack product of this nature should always be placed on the top shelf, especially given your recent pornography-themed advertising campaign, which I found of profoundly questionable taste and propriety. Perhaps you might encourage your retailers to place it next to other illicit supermarket products such as the wines, spirits, cigarettes, and chocolate digestive biscuits?

Secondly, I do not think that you place adequate warning on your packaging as to the 89g Pot Noodle™ Snack's contents. It is a fatty food and, if I may be frank here, it's too gorgeous!

I hope that you address my concerns with the utmost urgency, despite the time of year, taking them to the very highest level of your organisation, and beyond, if necessary. I expect to see an improvement within 72 hours of your receiving my letter. If I find no clear evidence of this, I shall be forced to contact my local Member of the House of Parliament, Westminster, London, with regard to the complaint. I may even draw it to the attention of Ms Diddums-Smythe, who lives next door, and who is Chair Person of my local Neighbourhood Watch Scheme (registered number available on request). Should she react to the news badly - and she has been very frail since she spent two weeks in hospital after she took that fall on her annual holiday in Bridlington, East Yorkshire, England - she may have a heart attack. Should this eventuality occur, I would be inclined to contact my legal representative and may press charges on you for negligence in the line of duty to what is right and proper.

Yours faithfully,
Christopher Whalen, Esq.

P.S. I am writing under a pseudonym to protect my statutory rights. You will still reach me if you use the name and address that I have declared at the top of this letter [removed in this posting - Ed.], but for legal purposes (as you may be hearing from me about Ms Diddums-Smythe in the future), my real name and address is Angry From, Esq., and I live in Tunbridge Wells.

Garden State (2004) - ickleReview (cinema)

The first feature film written, directed and starring Zach Braff - he from Scrubs, the quirky comedy TV series about junior doctors. Talented guy. Not sure if he wrote all the script. Maybe he did, but a few moments are slightly off-key - carrying the faint stench of a partial ghost-re-write, as if someone has been smoking in your room while you were out - such as his epiphanic screaming into the abyss in the rain; or the ending: at the crucial pause, at the final change of points before the station at the end of the line, the Fat Controller pulls the same old boring lever and the train idles into the same old boring platform that it always does; some of us were perhaps waiting optimistically at a different platform - just in case...you know?

On the whole, though, a very impressive effort. The dynamic between the two leads, Braff and Natalie Portman, is very similar to the courting couple of Jim Carrey and Kate Winslet in Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. Carrey, however, is slightly more lovable than Braff; as Portman just takes it by a cute nose over Winslet. The courting moments are particularly endearing, without being slushy. Braff has a way of catching the butterfly emotion of that delicious insecurity when you think you know that your innamorata is feeling just as good about things as you are, but neither of you comes full out and says it. There are pleasingly few kisses and they come late in the general Hollywood scheme of things. (Braff's character, Andrew Largeman - perhaps a play on his large Jewish schnozzle - has actually come back East to New Jersey from L.A., where his only acting break to date has been his portrayal of a retarded quarterback.)

There's some delightful Scrubs-style quirky humour, such as the opening sequence when Braff sits placidly serene, doped up on lithium, whilst the rest of the aircraft cabin panics in a crash dive. He's like the calm faces on the safety cards in the seat pocket in front of you, which Brad Pitt's character in Fight Club points out are actually high on oxygen; compared to the panicked faces which the Fight Club dudes switch them over with.

It plays with comedy and tragedy like the latest Woody Allen movie, Melinda and Melinda: the general premise of the script could sound like a depressing Bergman family psycho-drama. Think more along the lines of the weirdness of Charlie Kaufman and Donnie Darko, the visuals of Amelie and Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, with the dialogue of Richard Linklater and the perceptive wit of a stand-up comic - all of this without feeling derivative.

The teaser trailer is not a let-down and is a good aperitif to what is to come. And I love the thought that has gone into lines such as, "You know that point in your life when you realize the house you grew up in isn't really your home anymore? That idea of 'home' is gone. Maybe that's all family really is: a group of people that miss the same imaginary place."

Nugget: hot indie yin. I want seconds. I just hope Braff hasn't used up all his stuff.

Constantine P. Cavafy, [Extract from] "Ithaca" (1911)

If ever you're feeling bluesy, take comfort in these lines and remember that, as J. E. Buckrose says, "Happiness comes more from loving than being loved; and often when our affection seems wounded it is only our vanity bleeding. To love, and to be hurt often, and to love again - this is the brave and happy life."

So anyway, here's Cavafy:

Always keep Ithaca in your mind.
To arrive there is your ultimate goal.
But do not hurry the voyage at all.
It is better to let it last for many years;
and to anchor at the island when you are old,
rich with all you have gained on the way,
not expecting that Ithaca will offer you riches.

Ithaca has given you the beautiful voyage.
Without her you would have never set out on the road.
She has nothing more to give you.

And if you find her poor, Ithaca has not deceived you.
Wise as you have become, with so much experience,
you must already have understood what Ithacas mean.

Festival Express (2003) - ickleReview (cinema)

The boom of brilliant documentaries continues with Bob Smeaton's - and I rarely use this word - awesome festival movie. In 1970, a couple of Canadian festival promotors decided to lay on a private train to carry performers such as The Band, Janice Joplin and The Grateful Dead from a series of summer festivals in Toronto, Winnipeg and Calgary. The train was stacked with booze, no doubt some drugs, man, and some seriously cool rock 'n' roll. The jammin' goes on all night on the tracks between gigs; in fact, the gig never ends until the end of the line.

Not only does this movie look great, filmed in a cinema verite style; but it sounds sweet as, man. The sound engineering is first class all the way, with only a few quibbles to be had in the rough edged transitions between episodes. Every tune is rockin'; and, unlike most music videos, the visuals are encapsulating. In two Janis Joplin numbers, a single, front-on camera stares at her in close up. It is a shimmering performance. You don't have to know much about the musicians or even like their music beforehand: by the end of it, you'll be shouting "encore".

Nugget: you won't believe how rude and badly behaved those Canadian cats were who tried to gatecrash the gigs. If the best things in life are free, this one was worth paying for, man.

Click here for the DVD review.

Barrel of laughs

"Feelin' lucky, punk?"
"Erm, yes I am, actually."

Why do I do this every day?

There is a painted fence on the road from Oxford to London - I think it's on the M40 - which says "Why do I do this every day? NO WAR" - sometimes in different colours. At the moment, it's white letters on a green background. I always thought this was protest graffiti: the "NO WAR" stood out for me because there are similar daubings on the wall beside the church on Jackdaw Lane, the access road to the Iffley Road sports ground. I thought the question meant, "Why do I keep coming back to repaint this sign every day?" I realized today, however, that it could be - and probably is - intended for the commuters who travel to London to work every day. The "I" I always thought was the soliloquizing voice of the fence-painter, coming back in the middle of the night to redo his protest. It's specially angled for London-bound drivers to see at the bottom of a small enclave of trees. I wonder why I always thought of it from the lone artist's point of view, rather than the wider, more universal, audience's.

This Is Spinal Tap (1984) - ickleReview (DVD)

A mock rockumentary ripping it out of the likes of Led Zeppelin, Iron Maiden, Black Sabbath, Judas Priest, and Kiss. The band tries to "tap" the USA, but slowly crumbles as gigs are cancelled, the album (Smell My Glove) is delayed, and publicity stunts crash and burn. Some great cameos by Bruno Kirby as the limo driver, who, in the outtakes, gets Charles Fostered* and sings Sinatra in his underpants; and Billy Crystal as a mime artist, from the catering company Shut Up and Eat, serving hors d'oeuvres at a promotional drinks party.

Given the recent documentary, Metallica: Some Kind of Monster, it seems that maybe this stuff isn't really satyrical: it's not just close to the bone; it's scratching it. The Darkness certainly prove that camp rock is still cool to some people.

Nugget: for funnier Christopher Guest movies, see Best in Show (about pedigree dog breeders) and Waiting for Guffman (about amateur theatre).

* Charles Fostered > Citizen Kane > Charles Foster Kane > Kaned > caned (stoned).

The Good, the Bad and the Ugly (1966) - ickleReview (DVD)

Spaghetti Western directed by Sergio Leone. Clint Eastwood (The Good), Lee Van Cleef (The Bad) and Eli Wallach (The Ugly) scrabble against each other to recover $200,000 buried in an unmarked Civil War grave. Yet this is not about plot. It's about the stagnant parts where nothing happens except the twitch of a mouth, the dart of an eye, the rustle of a wagon hide in the wind. As with Sergio Leone's other movies - such as Once Upon a Time in the West (1968) - the soundtrack is vital to the atmosphere: not just the famous theme tune, but the sound effects so obviously dubbed on afterwards. It takes 10 minutes for the first words to be spoken.

There is a pervading sense of falseness in this film: the dirty, greasy faces; the distractingly dubbed soundtrack which doesn't quite sync up (there was a longer Italian version, 14 minutes from which are included on this DVD as an unseen footage special feature); the backlot feel of the shelled, abandoned towns. Yet it still makes compelling viewing.

Nugget: an acquired taste, but one that is well worth getting.

Muse by email

The Muse is a foundation established by the historian and thinker Theodore Zeldin that aims to stimulate courage and invention in personal, professional and cultural life. This discussion group, based on the ideas of the Muse, is a place for adventurous conversations. People from every continent can share their passions, tastes, beliefs, dreams and everything that shapes their understanding of life, and respond to the experiences and thoughts of others. You will be able to take off your mask and say who you really are, and engage in conversations that help you explore where your life is leading or could lead. If you are dissatisfied with superficial talk and want to discover who inhabits the world, please join us. You can find out more about Muse projects and how to become involved in The Muse at the Oxford Muse website.

The Panic in Needle Park (1971) - ickleReview (DVD)

Al Pacino shimmers in a movie about drug addicts in New York City. He is in love with a fellow waster called Helen (Kitty Winn). They scrounge around for dough and scores during a "panic": a time when money and a hit are hard to come by. They rat on each other. It's all nasty, especially when you see them shooting up.

New York's West Side looks ugly and gritty at the intersection at Broadway and 72nd Street. "Needle Park" is how it's known to the pimps, pushers and junkies. Soft and cuddly like a Disney movie it sure ain't.

Nugget: Al Pacino is always worth it. He should do a L'Oréal Elvive ad.

Chauvinism

Did you know that "chauvinism" (meaning extreme and unreasoning partisanship on behalf of a group to which one belongs, especially when the partisanship includes malice and hatred towards a rival group) is derived from Nicolas Chauvin, a soldier under Napoleon Bonaparte, due to his fanatical zeal for his Emperor? And it doesn't always mean "male chauvinism", although we of the superior sex are often prone to it.

America

It's so right, it's wrong.

Words of witan

If Milli Vanilli falls over in the woods, does somebody else make a sound?

Everyone has a photographic memory; some just don't have film.

Why is a delivery on a ship called a "cargo" and a delivery by car a "shipment"?

Most teenagers seem to think that being individual is looking like everyone else.

Writing about music is like dancing about architecture.

If something is adjustable, sooner or later it will need adjusting.

When you point one finger at someone else, you're pointing four at yourself. Think about that when you want to blame someone.

Is it possible to look cool whilst picking up a frisbee?

Under Capitalism, man exploits man. Under Communism, the reverse is true.

Never fall in love with a tennis player...love means nothing to them.

"I am, therefore I think." Isn't that putting Descartes before the horse?

In 1994, Los Angeles Police arrested a man for dressing up as the Grim Reaper – complete with scythe – and standing outside the windows of old peoples' homes and staring in.

Computer games don't affect kids; I mean if Pac-Man affected us as kids, we'd all be running around in darkened rooms, munching magic pills and listening to repetitive electronic music. (Kristian Wilson, Nintendo, Inc., 1989)

If practice makes perfect and nobody's perfect, then why practise?

If you send someone a bag of snow and it melts in the post, they won't get your drift.

Victor Hugo once said, "You can prevent the invasion of armies, but not the invasion of ideas." What he really meant to say was, "You can prevent the invasion of armies, unless you're French."

(Borrowed from "Things We Didnt' Know" on www.iwantoneofthose.com. I'll give them back...honest.)

Fainting

I fainted earlier this week. It was quite nice. I had just given blood in the Town Hall and was sitting by the biscuits table, having a drink of orange squash. My vision started to black out, so I asked for more juice (logical step). One of the nurses noticed I was headed elsewhere and, with the help of the man serving drinks, tried to walk me over to the bed to lie down. I wanted to go before then - being a cat - so I curled up on the floor for a snooze. That's how it felt. I had some dreamy thing, then when I came to, I was in the recovery position and the nurse was putting a sinky soft pillow under my head. I was really comfortable in my cosy A&F grey hoody. I've felt faint before after giving blood, and when I dislocated my collar bone, but I've never been unconscious. You should try it sometime.

Silent Shakespeare (1899-1911) - ickleReview (cinema)

A collection of seven silent short adaptations of Shakespeare plays, filmed between 1899 and 1911 in the UK, US and Italy. They have been compiled by the British Film Institute and set to music by London College of Music graduate Laura Rossi (performed live at this screening at the Phoenix Picturehouse, Oxford). The titles are King John, The Tempest, A Midsummer Night's Dream, King Lear, Twelfth Night, The Merchant of Venice, and Richard III. They are certainly worth restoring because they are part of the early history of cinema; but by modern standards of film-making, they seem quaint and primitive. Because they are silent, the acting is often exaggerated and melodramatic, and some of the films - notably King John and Richard III - show the heavy influence of theatre on early cinema.

Nugget: turn on the projector and the rest is silence.

Coffee and Cigarettes (2003) - ickleReview (cinema)

A collection of black-and-white set pieces of familiar faces in unfamiliar attitudes having cigarettes and coffee. Many of the sketches have an improvised, first-take feel, as if the actors have only been given a few concepts and been asked to ad lib their way through it. Some scenes are more compelling than others. Bill Murray's with GZA and RZA from the Wu-Tang Clang, and Steve Coogan with Alfred Molina are the funniest. Writer/Director Jim Jarmusch somehow manages to fold them all together into some sort of coherence - not that coherence is needed - but some elements recur: such as the remark that coffee and cigarettes don't make a very healthy lunch or Nikolai Tesla's conception of "the earth as a conductor for acoustical resonance".

Nugget: "Isn't it funny how when you can't afford something it costs a fortune, but suddenly when you can afford it it's just, like, free?"

ickleReviews

Since Sunday 12 September 2004, I've been reviewing every film I see at the cinema, on video or DVD, and on TV. The reviews are supposed to be "ickle": small and easy to digest, giving you just enough about the film to help you decide whether or not you want to see it. Sometimes the reviews are very short, so if you'd like me to expand any of them, let me know by email and I'll add to it.

Update (Tuesday 5 January 2010): I haven't reviewed any films since Brüno (in a vain attempt to streamline my life and get on with my DPhil without unnecessary clutter) but I've still added these films to this list and given them a rating. These are the films without hyperlinks, such as The Boondock Saints.

Update (Monday 11 January 2010): I'm now going to try reviewing films within Twitter's limit of 140 characters, starting with The Road.

ickleRatings explained:
* a must-see: miss this and you're a damn fool
+ pooty good: a fair crack of the whip
= so-so: won't give you rabies, but don't break a leg to see it
- stinks royally: avoid like the plague

A
À bout de souffle +

About Time (in-flight movie) +
About Time (DVD) *
The Adjustment Bureau +
Adult Life Skills +
Adventureland +
Afghan Star =
Aileen: Life and Death of a Serial Killer =
AKA =
Alan Partridge: Alpha Papa =
Alexander -
Alice +
Alice Doesn't Live Here Anymore +
All Good Things =

All the President’s Men +
All This Mayhem +

American Hustle +
Amores perros =
Amy +
Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy =
Andre the Giant +
Annie Hall *
L'Argent +
Argo +
The Armstrong Lie +

Arrival +
Arthur Christmas (3D) +
The Artist *
The Assassination of Richard Nixon =
Atonement +
Avatar +
Away We Go +

B
The Babadook +
Baby Driver +
Bad Education =
Bananas =
Band of Brothers *
Batman Begins -
Battle of the Sexes +
The Beat That My Heart Skipped (AKA De battre mon coeur s'est arrete) =
A Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood +
Before Midnight *
Before Sunrise *
Before Sunset *
Beginners +
Behind the Candelabra -
Be Kind Rewind -
Belleville Rendez-Vous +
Benda Bilili! +
Bend It Like Beckham =
Best Shot (AKA Hoosiers) -
The Bicycle Thieves (AKA Ladri di biciclette) *
Bigger Stronger Faster* +

Big Hero 6 +

The Big Lebowski *
The Big Short +

The Big Sick +

Billy Elliot +
Black Hawk Down +
BlacKkKlansman +
Black Orpheus =
Black Panther =
The Blind Side +
Bloom =
Blow Out +
Blow-Up =
Blue Blood +
Blue Jasmine +

The Blues Brothers =
The Bodyguard -

Bohemian Rhapsody +
Bombshell +
The Book of Life =
Booksmart *
The Boondock Saints =
Borat: Cultural Learnings of America for Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan +
The Bourne Identity +
The Bourne Supremacy +
The Bourne Ultimatum +
Bowling for Columbine +
Boyhood +
The Breakfast Club -
Breaking Away +
Breaking the Waves =
Brick +
Bridesmaids =
Bridge of Spies +

Bring It On =
Broadway Danny Rose =
Broken Flowers +
Brokeback Mountain =
Brooklyn +

Bros: After the Screaming Stops +
Brüno =
A Bug's Life =
Bugsy Malone +
Bullets Over Broadway +
Butterfly on a Wheel =

C
Café Society +

Call Me By Your Name *

Calvary +

Can You Ever Forgive Me? +
Capitalism: A Love Story +
Capote =

Captain Fantastic +
Captain Phillips +
Captain Underpants =
Carnage (cinema) +
Carnage (TV) *

Carol (35mm) +
Casino Royale +
Cassandra's Dream =
Catching Hell +
Catfish +
Cemetery Junction =
Certain Women +
CGI-brows =

Charade =
Charge: The Electric TT =
Chariots of Fire =

Check It =
Chelsea on the Rocks =
Chinatown =
Chocolat +
A Christmas Story +
The Circle =
City Slickers -
Closer (cinema) +
Closer (DVD) +
A Cock and Bull Story +
Coco +
Coffee and Cigarettes =
Cold Mountain =
Collateral +
The Color of Money =
The Commitments *
Contact =
Control Room =
The Conversation =
Cookie's Fortune =
The Cooler =
Coraline =
The Corporation =
Crash (cinema) =
Crash (DVD) +
Crazy Rich Asians =
Crimes and Misdemeanors +

Cruel Intentions =
C.S.A.: The Confederate States of America -
The Curse of the Jade Scorpion +

D
Danny Collins =

Darkest Hour +

Dating Amber =
Day & Night (3D) +
Dazed and Confused *
Dead Poets Society +
Dead Man's Shoes +
Dean Spanley =
The Death of Stalin +
Death Proof +
Deconstructing Harry +
Deep Throat =
Denial =
The Departed =
Derailroaded +
The Descent -
Despicable Me =
Despicable Me 2 =
The Devil's Advocate =
Die Another Day =
Diego Maradona +
DiG! +
Diner +
District 9 +
Django Unchained +
Documentary: The Margins of Reality -
Dog Altogether +
Dogville *
Do I Sound Gay? +
Donnie Brasco =
Donnie Darko +
Donnie Darko: The Director's Cut +
Double Indemnity +
Down by Law =
Downfall +
Draft Day -
Drive +
Drugstore Cowboy =
Due Date =

Dunkirk +
Dylan Moran: Monster =

E
Eastern Promises =
Easy Riders, Raging Bulls +
Eddie Murphy Raw +
Eddie Izzard: Unrepeatable +
Edge of Seventeen +
An Education +

El Camino: A Breaking Bad Movie +
End of the Century: The Story of the Ramones =

End of Watch +
An Englishman Abroad =
Enigma -
Enough Said +
Enron: The Smartest Guys in the Room +
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind +
Être et avoir +
Everybody Wants Some!! +
Every Little Thing (AKA La Moindre des choses) =
Everyone Says I Love You +
Everything in This Country Must +
Everything You Always Wanted to Know About Sex* But Were Afraid to Ask =
Exit Through the Gift Shop +
Ex Machina +

F
Fahrenheit 11/9 +

The Falling =
The Farewell +
Fargo (DVD) +
Fargo (Netflix) +

The Fast and the Furious =
Fast Food Nation +
Fast Times at Ridgemont High =
The Favourite +
Ferris Bueller's Day Off =
Festival Express (cinema) *
Festival Express (DVD) *
50 First Dates =
Fight Club +
Film Stars Don't Die in Liverpool +

The Final Year +
Finding Forrester =
Finding Neverland =
Finding Vivian Maier +

First Man +

Fisherman's Friends =
5x2 +
500 Days of Summer =
The Five-Year Engagement =
Flags of Our Fathers =
The Florida Project +
Following James Joyce, Dublin to Buffalo +
The Football Factory =
Forgetting Sarah Marshall =
Forrest Gump +

The Founder +
Four Lions +
Four Weddings and a Funeral =
The 40 Year Old Virgin +

Framing Britney Spears =
Frances Ha +
Frankie and Johnny +
Frankie Boyle Live +
Frankie Howerd on Campus -
Freaky Friday +
Friday Night Lights +
Fried Green Tomatoes at the Whistle Stop Cafe *
Friends with Benefits =
Frost/Nixon +

Fruitvale Station +

The Full Monty +
Funny Cow +
Funny People =
Fury =

G
Garden State (cinema) +
Garden State (DVD) +
Gerry =
Get Out +
Gifted +
Gilda -

The Godfather +
The Godfather: Part II +
Gonzo: The Life and Work of Dr. Hunter S. Thompson -
Good Bye Lenin! +
Goodfellas +
The Good, the Bad and the Ugly +
The Good Girl =
Good Night, and Good Luck. +
The Good Samaritan -
Good Vibrations +
Good Will Hunting +
A Good Woman -
Googlewhack Adventure +
Gosford Park *
The Grand Budapest Hotel =

Grandma +
Gravity *
The Great Global Warming Swindle +
Green Book +

Green Zone +
Gregory's Girl +
Grosse Pointe Blank =
The Guard =
A Guide to Recognizing Your Saints +

H
Hail, Caesar! +
Hallam Foe +
Handkerchief Drill +
Hannah and Her Sisters +
Happy-Go-Lucky +
Harold and Maude +
Hearts and Minds +
Heat =
The Heat =
Hero =
He's Just Not That Into You -
Hidden (AKA Cache) +

Hidden Figures =

High Fidelity +
Hillsborough =

The Hippopotamus +
The History Boys *
The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy =
Hollywood Ending =
Hostel =
Hot Fuzz =
The House I Live In +
House of Flying Daggers =
Hugo (3D) =
The Hunger Games =
The Hunger Games: Catching Fire =
Hunt for the Wilderpeople +
The Hurt Locker +
Husbands and Wives =

HyperNormalisation +

I
I Am Sam +

I, Daniel Blake +
Igby Goes Down =
I Heart Huckabees =
The Imitation Game +
The Inbetweeners Movie =
The Inbetweeners 2 =
In Bruges +
Inception (cinema) +
Inception (DVD) +
An Inconvenient Truth +
The Incredibles =
Inglourious Basterds +
Ingrid Goes West -
Inside Deep Throat =
Inside Llewyn Davis +
Inside Out *
The Interpreter -
In the Fade +

In the House (AKA Dans la maison) +

In the Land of the Deaf (AKA Le Pays des sourds) *
Invictus =
Iris =
The Iron Lady +
Irrational Man +
Isle of Dogs =
I, Tonya +
It's a Wonderful Life +

J

Jackie =
Jarhead =
Jaws =
Jeremy +
Jericho Days =
Jesus Camp +
Jojo Rabbit =

Joker -

Judy =

Julie & Julia +

Juliet, Naked +
Juno +
Just Mercy +

K

Kedi =
The Kids Are Alright +

Killing Patient Zero +
The King of Comedy +

The Kings of Summer *
The King's Speech =
Kinsey -
Knives Out +
Knocked Up +
Kolja (AKA Kolya) +

L
Lady Bird +
Lady Chatterley +

The Lady in the Van +

La La Land +
Lars and the Real Girl +
Last Days +
The Last King of Scotland +
The Last of the First =

Leave No Trace +

Legally Blonde -
The Lego Movie =
Le Mans '66 (AKA Ford v Ferrari) +
Letters from Iwo Jima +
Letter to Brezhnev =
Liberal Arts +
Life, Animated +
The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou =
Life in a Day +
Life Is Beautiful (AKA La Vita è bella) +
Like Crazy +
Limitless =
The Lion King =
Little Men +
Little Miss Sunshine +

Little Women +
The Lives of Others (AKA Das Leben der Anderen) *
Local Hero =
Locke =
The Loneliness of the Long Distance Runner =
Looking for Eric +
Looper -
Loose Change: 2nd Edition =
The Lost City of Z =
Love Actually +
Love and Death =
Love & Mercy +
Love Is Strange +
Love, Simon +

Lucy =

M
McQueen +

Made in Dagenham =
The Madness of King George +
Maggie's Plan +

Magic in the Moonlight +

Mamma Mia! =

Mamma Mia! Here We Go Again =
Manhattan *
Manhattan Murder Mystery =
Man on Wire +
March of the Penguins +

Marjorie Prime +
The Mark of Cain =
Marley +
Marriage Story +
The Martian +
Mary Poppins =
The Master +
Match Point (cinema) +
Match Point (DVD) +
Mayor of the Sunset Strip =
Mean Girls =
Me and You and Everyone We Know +
Meet the Fockers -
Melinda and Melinda +
Memento *
The Merchant of Venice =
Mesrine: Killer Instinct =
Mesrine: Public Enemy No. 1 =
Micmacs (AKA Micmacs à tire-larigot) +
Midnight in Paris +
Mid90s +
A Midsummer Night's Sex Comedy =
Mighty Aphrodite +
A Mighty Wind =

Military Wives +
Minions =
The Mirror -
Misbehaviour =
Miss Americana =
Miss Sloane +
Mistress America +

Moana +
Moneyball +
Monster =
Moon +
Moonlight +
Moonlight Mile *

Moonrise Kingdom =

A Most Wanted Man =
The Motorcycle Diaries =

Mrs Doubtfire =
Murderball +
Murder on the Orient Express =
The Muse =

My Best Friend's Wedding =

N
Napoleon Dynamite =
Neighbors -
Network +
New York Doll +
Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist =
Nightcrawler +
9 Songs =
1917 *

99 Homes +
9th Company +

Nocturnal Animals +
No Country for Old Men +
No Direction Home: Bob Dylan +

Nomadland +
Non-Fiction +
Nora +

North by Northwest =
Northern Soul +
Notes on a Scandal +

Notting Hill =
Nowhere Boy +

O
Obvious Child +
Office Space +
Official Secrets =
Of Gods and Men +
On a Clear Day =
Once Upon a Time… in Hollywood +

Once Were Brothers: Robbie Robertson and The Band +
On Golden Pond *
On the Basis of Sex +
Once Upon a Time in America =
One Day in September +
Operator +

Out of Sight =

The Outsiders -
Overlord *
The Overnighters +

P
Paddington +
Paddington 2 +

Palm Springs +
The Panic in Needle Park =

Pan's Labyrinth +
Parasite +
Partly Cloudy +
The Passion of the Christ -
Paterno =
Paul =
Paul Weller: Studio 150 =
The Perks of Being a Wallflower +
The Personal History of David Copperfield +
Phantom Thread +

Philadelphia =
Phone Booth +
Pickle =
Pierrepoint (cinema) +
Pierrepoint (DVD) +
Pitch Perfect +
Pitch Perfect 2 =
Play It Again, Sam =
Porky's -
Portrait of a Lady on Fire *
The Poseidon Adventure -

The Post +
A Prairie Home Companion *
Precious: Based on the Novel Push by Sapphire +

The Prestige =
Pretty in Pink =
Pride =
The Princess and the Frog +
The Princess Bride =
The Producers =
Professor Marston and the Wonder Women =
The Program =
Project Nim +
Proof =
A Prophet (AKA Un prophète) +
Pumping Iron +
Punk's Not Dead +
The Purple Rose of Cairo +

Puzzle +

Q
Quick Change =
The Queen =

R
Radio Days =
Rain Man +

Reality Bites =
Red Lights (AKA Feux Rouges) +
Red Road +
The Red Turtle +
Remember the Titans +
Rize +
The Road +
Rocketman +
Rocky Road to Dublin =
Roger & Me +
Roger Dodger =
Roma +
Romantics Anonymous +
Romanzo criminale =
Room +

Room 237 +

Rounders +
Rush +

S

Saint Frances +
Saloon =
Saving Mr. Banks +
Saw =
Say Anything… +
A Scanner Darkly +
Scent of a Woman =
School Ties =
Scoop +
Scott Pilgrim vs. the World +
Sea of Love =
Searching +
Searching for Sugar Man +
Secretary =
The Selfish Giant +
Senna +

Seven Psychopaths +
Shadows and Fog =

The Shape of Water =
The Shining +
Shrek the Third =
Shut Up and Play the Hits +

Sicario +
Sicko +
Sideways =
The Silence of the Lambs +
Silent Running =
Silent Shakespeare =
Silver City =

Silver Linings Playbook +
The Simpsons Movie +
Sin City +
Singin' in the Rain =
Singles =

Sing Street +
Sin Nombre +
16 Blocks =

Skate Kitchen +
Skyfall =
Sleeper =
Sleepless in Seattle =
Slumdog Millionaire =
Small Time Crooks =

The Social Dilemma =
The Social Network +
Some Kind of Wonderful +
Some Like It Hot =
Somersault +
Somers Town +

Soul +
SoulBoy (cinema) +
SoulBoy (HD) +

Sound of Metal +
Source Code *

The Souvenir +
Spectre =
Spellbound +

Spotlight +

Stand By Me *
Stardust Memories -
A Star Is Born (2018) +
Starsky & Hutch =
Steve Jobs +
Still Alice +
The Stone Roses: Made of Stone *
The Stone Tape -
Strictly Ballroom =
Stronger +
Style Wars +
subUrbia =

Sully =
Sunshine on Leith +
Superbad =
Super Size Me (cinema) =
Super Size Me (TV) =

Supersonic =
Sweet and Lowdown =

Sweet Sixteen +

Swimming with Men +
Swingers +
Synecdoche, New York +

T
Take the Money and Run =
Ted =

Tenet +
The Terminal =
Thank You for Smoking +

Their Finest +
The Theory of Everything +
There Will Be Blood +
The Thin Blue Line +

The Third Man =

13 Going on 30 =
37 Uses for a Dead Sheep =
This Is England *
This Is Spinal Tap =
This Sporting Life =

Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri *
Three Colours: Blue (AKA Trois couleurs: Bleu) +
Three Colours: Red (AKA Trois couleurs: Rouge) +
Three Colours: White (AKA Trois couleurs: Blac) +

Three Identical Strangers +

Three Kings +

Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy =

To All the Boys: Always and Forever =
To All the Boys I've Loved Before =
To All the Boys: P.S. I Still Love You =
To Rome With Love =
Toy Story 3 (3D) +
Traffic =

Training Day =
Trainwreck +
Trance =

The Trial of the Chicago 7 +
Trucker +
True Grit (2010) +
True History of the Kelly Gang -
True Stories: Biggie and Tupac =
Tsotsi +
TT3D: Closer to the Edge (2D) +

T2 Trainspotting +

12 Angry Men +
20th Century Women +
21 =
The Two Popes +
2001: A Space Odyssey *

U
Uncut Gems =
Under the Skin +
United 93 +
Untouchable (AKA Intouchables) +
Up (2D) *
Up in the Air +

Us +
The U.S. vs. John Lennon +

V
Ventoux +

Vice +

Vicky Cristina Barcelona +

W
Wag the Dog +
Waking Life +
Walk the Line -
Wallace & Gromit in The Curse of the Were-Rabbit +
WALL·E +
The War Room +
Wayne's World =
The Way Way Back +
We Are Marshall =
Wedding Crashers =
Weiner +
Le Week-end +
Whatever Works +
What Maisie Knew +
What's New, Pussycat -
What's Up, Tiger Lily? =
What We Did on Our Holiday =
When Harry Met Sally... *
When the Levees Broke: A Requiem in Four Acts +
When We Were Kings =
Whip It +
Whiplash +

Whitney +

Whitney: Can I Be Me =
Wide Sargasso Sea =

Widows +
Wiener-Dog =
The Wife =
The Wind That Shakes the Barley +
Winter's Bone =
Won't You Be My Neighbor +
The Woodsman =
Woody Allen: A Documentary +

Working Girl -
World Trade Center -

X
X-Men =

Y
Yesterday =
Your Father's Murderer: A Letter to Zachary +
Your Sister's Sister +

Youth in Revolt =
You've Got Mail (TV) =
You've Got Mail (Amazon Video) =
You Will Meet a Tall Dark Stranger +

Z
Zelig =
Zombieland +
Zoolander =

Chinatown (1974) - ickleReview (cinema)

A late film noir by director Roman Polanski, who in this film has a cameo role where he puts a flick knife up Jack Nicholson's nose and cuts his nostril open, so that Wacko Jacko has to spend the rest of the film with a rediculous bandage on his schnozzle.

It's a hot summer in LA. Water levels are low. Private snoop Jake Gittes (Nicholson) is hired by a distressed wife to expose her husband, whom she insists is having an affair. It turns out he works for the city water board and that not everything is as it first seemed. A great script continually flashes "wrong way" signs, just after it has assured you that this was the diversion to get round the traffic jam. We see things from Gittes's perspective - we feel how he is cut out of the loop and lied to repeatedly by his clients.

There are some odd moments in this film, like when Faye Dunaway rests her head on the steering wheel of her car, accidentally tooting the horn: some odd laughs, that may have been outtakes that were left in, or deliberate jibes by Polanski.

Nugget: shows real affection for an old genre, in which Wilder and Welles used to excel - but arguably does it better. A pleasure to see it for the first time on the big screen, even if the print was ageing and the projectionist fiddled with the focus for the first fifteen minutes.

Rock 'n' Rule

He, and indeed, he

Fight Club (1999) - ickleReview (DVD)

The first rule of Fight Club is: You do not talk about Fight Club.
The second rule of Right Club is: You do not talk about Fight Club.
The third rule of Fight Club is: You do not quote these lines.

(I'm sure those rules were created just to make the trailers sound cool; or to prevent spoilers. Hence, I won't talk about Fight Club and ruin the plot.)

It's a while since I've seen this. Movies like this (and Memento, The Usual Suspects, The Shawshank Redeption, The Sixth Sense) lose their impact on a second viewing. But it's still a stylish and well made film; and Brad Pitt is on form, even if he doesn't have to do much because his character is so cool already.

Edward Norton plays an office bum (like Neo in The Matrix, except not as gay) who is bullied by his boss, unhappy and insomniac. He goes to group therapy for testicular cancer so he can cry on Meat Loaf's bitch tits (contrary to reports, he was not wearing a fat suit: those were real). The plot has the appearance of being all joined up: "It all started when I met a girl called Marla Singer..."; but it's more like a blind person is playing dot-to-dot on a bumpy bus ride.

The best parts of this film are the little things: like the airline safety card that shows the passengers' true emotions during a sea-landing (panic); the line about making expensive soap from liposuction fat: "It was beautiful. We were selling rich women their own fat asses back to them"; or the bit when Norton says if he could fight any historic figure, he's fight Gandhi. On the whole, there's some great writing (most of it, I suspect, in Chuck Palahniuk's novel), like when a cancer patient gets up to talk about her experiences: "Chloe looked the way Meryl Streep's skeleton would look if you made it smile and walk around the party being extra nice to everybody."

Nugget: The fourth rule of Fight Club is: Shut up already!

The Corporation (2003) - ickleReview (cinema)

Corporations are inhumane, but they have the legal status of a single human being. This is a documentary which explains how this happened and what the effects are. It is quite lengthy (145 minutes), but the sort of audiences who want to learn about this stuff are going to tolerate it. This - again - makes America look bad (mainly because it is home of the world's most powerful corporations like Nike, Coca-Cola and McDonald's). Did you know, for example, that IBM supplied the "business solution" for Nazi concentration camp administration: an early form of computer: the punch-card database?

This is a well balanced film, with opinion from right-wing think-tankers, Nobel Prize-winning (hawk) economists, reformed conscience CEOs, Michael Moore, and Noam Chomsky. There's a hilarious scene from one of Moore's movies when he goes to sing Christmas carols - in true corporate spirit - in the foyer of a large tobacco company...with victims of throat cancer, who squawk along, holding a finger to the hole in their throat.

But it's not all end-of-the-world stuff. There are some uplifting citings of the people uprising in Bolivia to oppose the privitization of their city's water supply; of advocates for sustainable development; of smalltown American communities boycotting chain stores. We (or our lawyers did) gave birth to this monster; but we can also slay it like Beowulf.

Nugget: Not quite as engaging as Mark Achbar's 1992 film, Manufacturing Consent: Noam Chomsky and the Media, but still makes informative and at times entertaining and funny viewing.

Want to get laid?

Crawl up a chicken's ass...and wait!

Dumb fuck shopping

I went to The Computer Shop to buy some blank CDs for my computer. I got CD-RWs, thinking it might be useful to be able to rewrite them if I make changes to my files. When I get them home, I realize that my drive can't handle Ultra Speed, only High Speed. So a few days later, I take the CDs back to the shop to exchange them; only The Computer Shop has a really narky returns policy and won't allow it. So I wait to speak to the manager, who doesn't turn up for ages, so I just buy some CD-Rs and have done with it. I have my rucksack with me, so I don't ask for a bag. It's crammed full of books and two reams of paper, so it's hard to fit it all in. Later in the afternoon, when I'm meeting a friend for tea and lunch, I realize that I haven't actually packed the CD-Rs; I've got the RWs, which are useless to me, but must have left the Rs on the counter! So I return sheepishly, tail between my legs, later in the day to ask for my CD-Rs, with my receipt to prove what an idiot I have been. Re:tardy?